Hello, A2Z readers.
Many of my articles have been rather long lately, and while those can be fun and I’ll be likely to produce more of that kind of content, they can take a long time to write, and, in your case, a long time to read. Hence, I wanted to try some short form stuff for a change.
A few weeks back, Aidan penned a rendition of The Night Before Christmas, titled The Night Before Football. I thought I’d try my hand at the same type of thing, focused on Mac Jones’ recent negative publicity for a (alleged) cheap shot to the balls of Sauce Gardener, ripping off Robert Frost’s famous poem The Road Not Taken.
Now, I’m not totally convinced he even meant to do it nor do I think he’s particularly dirty, but he did kick Jaquan Brisker in the nuts last season, and it’s a hilarious phenomenon either way.
Anyway, if you liked Aidan’s work, you should like this too (although mine might be a tad less couth), and if you didn’t like his, you can leave; this is a blog, not a prison.
Also, I highly recommend you read the linked poem by Frost first, not just because my poem will make a lot more sense with that background, but also because you could probably use a little more culture.
Without further adieu…
The Chode not Shaken
His hand converged towards Sauce’s wood,
As for nuts, Mac wanted to hit both
And being a repeat offender, Mac understood
And hid it from the cameras the best he could
His shot to where it would hurt the most;
There was another, he was a Bear,
And having clear video for his claim,
Brisker got it nasty from Mac’s footwear;
Though as for the goal of whacking their pairs
The intent from Mac was the same,
And both the players did not like the way
That they had been battered by Mac.
Oh, this has no place on the field of play!
Touching this many Johnsons seemed almost gay,
They think he’s focused on the wrong sacks.
They had hoped he’d miss and hit a thigh
Somewhere the pain is less intense.
Two men struck in their manhoods, that guy—
Mac hit them so low that they might cry,
And that has come at the defenders’ expense.
-Jack, 2023